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August 26th, 2005

Fat Bastard

I ran head-on into another one of those moments where I realized I needed to do something about my weight. Earlier today when washing my hands at the bathroom sink, I looked up into the mirror and had a momentary disconnect. For some reason, my mental self-image suddenly reverted to what I looked like three years ago, which allowed me to easily examine I was seeing in the mirror. I didn't like it. I felt like Austin Powers when he walked in on Fat Bastard and Felicity Shagwell.

I'm fat, out of shape, and it shows that I haven't gone to the gym or eaten healthily in over eight months.

Twice now I've lost large amounts of weight and then put it back on. In fact, it wouldn't surprise me to find out that I'm actually heavier than I was 15 months ago, the last time I got disgusted with myself. Even worse, unlike those previous efforts at losing weight, I no longer have quick and easy access to a gym at lunch nor times in my daily routine where I can easily fit in the exercise -- I now literally have to create time somewhere in my schedule to do this, and more than ever time is at a premium to me.

Of course, if I had just kept the weight off after either of the previous efforts, I wouldn't be in the position I'm in now. There's only one person I can blame, and I'm pretty pissed off at him right now.

Time to figure out how I'm going to handle this. Although it's not close enough for me to go there, work about and come back from in just one hour, I am close enough to one of my gym's branches to walk over and do a weigh-in. I have to face the beast again before it devours me.

The Moment of Truth

Okay, it wasn't as bad as I feared, but it still wasn't good. After to making it over to the gym and removing my shoes and other extraneous items, the scale topped out at almost exactly where I started the last time I fervently acted to lose weight. Not the 1941 Phillies bad that I feared.. it was more like 2000 Phillies bad.

Getting back on diet shouldn't be hard -- that's never really been much of an issue (the issue with food is staying on diet for more than 6-10 months at a time). My real conundrum is finding exercise time. I realized while walking over to the gym that there is still a lunch option: going for long walks during my lunch hour. While not ideal -- I won't get the same level of exercise as getting a half hour of cardio on an elliptical motion machine -- it will burn a couple hundred calories per day. The other downside is that on days with less than ideal weather conditions I might be more inclined to skip the walk altogether. On the other hand, if I decide to go this route, then I could conceivably end the gym membership. It would be nice to free up the $40/month I'm paying for it.

It's all something for me to mull over this weekend.

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